The Life Quilt for Breast Cancer

The Origin of "The Life Quilt for Breast Cancer"

The Power of an Inspiration

by Shelora Fitzgerald, M.Ed.

In 1991, recently diagnosed with metastasized breast cancer and abandoned by her husband, shortly thereafter, 33-year-old Judy Reimer found herself alone with two children less than three years old to care for, one of them autistic.

Two years later, after a double mastectomy, radiation and chemotherapy, she realized she could no longer work as a psychiatric nurse. But she was determined to be of service in some capacity, so she called me for career counselling.

During our first phone conversation in the Fall of 1993, she told me she wanted to leave a legacy for her children. “I want them to have something more than a memory of me with my head over the toilet.” We scheduled a meeting and I asked her to do some homework in preparation.

After two attempts to meet, (which she had to reschedule due to overwhelming pain,) Judy finally made it to my office with the assistance of morphine. She was modest, well dressed, soft spoken, completely sincere, and radiant with a quiet wisdom.

I was pleased to see that Judy had done her assignment. She answered my questions about her life, her passions, and her dreams in a matter of fact way, but what struck me was the way she talked about how quilting had been her salvation while she had been in hospital.

She told me she had often used the ruse of saying that she needed to finish the square she was working on, before she went for another painful test or procedure. The nurses always respected her desire to complete her small task. In her quiet, but firm, way she made it clear she was going on her own terms and in her own time.

That is how Judy lived her whole life. With dignity.

Judy felt that our conversation on the phone, particularly the spiritual aspect of it, wa a miracle. She knew that I was the right person to talk to because we shared a faith in God. She made it easy to talk about her impending death and what it meant to her. Her courage, honesty and humility shone through clearly.So did her dry sense of humour.

She told me she had painted an image of a tree growing up the wall over the toilet in her two-bedroom basement apartment.

“They’re taking me out of there in a box, so don’t care if they like it or not! ” she told me wryly. “They can darn well paint it over after I’m gone!”

There was a glint of triumph in her eye as she relished these small victories. I asked her to tell me about her homework, which had been to describe five other lives she might have lived, She talked about owning a fabric store, and other things related to quilting. But she really lit up when she described "living in a tree house so that I could hear the Voice of God in the wind. "

In that office we became Divinely guided co-conspirators against death. As she described the defiant tree growing up her wall, I was inspired with a vision of her destiny to create what would be called the Tree of Life Quilt for Breast Cancer (later shortened to The Life Quilt for Breast Cancer.)

I held back from saying what I had seen, hoping she would recognize the logical expression of her passion herself. But sometimes we cannot see what is most obvious about ourselves to others.

After twenty minutes of conversation about what she wanted people to know about Beast Cancer, including a hilarious anecdote about breast puppets she had used as a nurse, I could hold back no more. I told her what I had visualized., a Quilt that would be dedicated to raising funds for those living with Breast Cancer. I said that, if she created the Quilt, she would probably be on the front page of the Vancouver Sun and on the Vicki Gabareau Show (Canada’s Oprah) within six months. She could use it to raise money to assist women dealing with Breast Cancer and raising children.

When Judy heard my description of what I saw in store for her, she was genuinely taken aback. She said, “I think you have me mixed up with somebody else. I’m just a humble ordinary person!”

But I persisted. After all, my greatest joy is inspiring people to live their dreams, even dreams they may not have recognized yet! I felt privileged to hold up the mirror for this great spirit and show her her destiny.

“But I can’t do this all by myself!”

I assured her she didn't have to do it alone. Simply from meeting her, it was clear to me that she was a much loved woman and had many friends just waiting to hear how they could support her. It was equally clear that she had Divine assistance from invisible realms. All she had to do was ask.

She finally surrendered to the call, saying, " All right then. How do I do it?”

I suggested she invite them all to a potluck dinner at my house, tell them what she wanted to create, and ask them to join with her in making it real.

Two weeks later, Judy and forty of her closest friends came to my home for a "Dream Night" in my living room. We feasted on incredibly delicious offerings that her friends had brought and shared, Then we pulled out the flip chart and started brainstorming.

I was so certain that this project would fly, that I had alled another of my clients whose dream was to “make movies about the stories of ordinary heroes.” I told her to get herself a TV camera man somehow, and show up erady to shoot, because this was going to be the beginning of an amazing story. She did, and it was.

That client went on to create a career in film-making and is currently an assistant director on Hollywood films. But her first film was her documentary on the Life Quilt.

When Judy stood up to speak, she was irresistible. As she described the experience of the rebirth of her creative spirit that getting Breast Cancer had ignited in her, she was lighting us up with her passion for life.

She compared the experience of getting breast cancer to a beautiful forest being struck by lightening causing a forest fire. After the shock and devastation of the fire, she said, everything seemed dead, futile, hopeless, But then, slowly, there was new growth; the forest floor began to come alive again.

Not only was she on fire, but she had already formulated her vision for the Quilt, and had found an artist who was willing to execute it. She described for us what she could see in her mind's eye. Three large painted fabric panels would show the beautiful forest struck by lightening and going up in flames. Then there were the ashes of the devastated forest, followed by the new growth of forest flowers and ferns. Thousands of smaller individual squares would be sreated and stitched on by those who wanted their loved ones remembered. These small squares would be added in three rows framing the large central painted panels.

But the most important thing to Judy was that this quilt serve to raise funds, not for a cure but to support those living with Breast Cancer. She was adamant that we understand that, even though they might be living with a terminal diagnosis, "We are not dead yet!"

Moved by Judy's commitment and courage, by the end of the evening we had launched The Life Quilt for Breast Cancer.

And that was just the beginning.

As a result of that memorable evening, the magnificent piece of art called The Life Quilt for Breast Cancer traveled all across Canada and back. It was stitched on by over 20,000 women and men and displayed in hundreds of art galleries across the country.

Within six months Judy was on the front page of the Vancouver Sun. Around that time I introduced Judy and the Life Quilt to Vicky Gabareau, who interviewed her on the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation (CBC). Vicki was so impressed with Judy and her project, that she asked ,"Why haven't I heard about this before?"

Finally, after a couple of years on the road, the huge quilt was assembled and brought back to Vancouver where it was exhibited in the lobby of Robson Square Centre, accompanied by a display of all the squares. Each one had a photograph of the square accompanied by the story related to the person it was dedicated to. BCTV News Anchor, Pamela Martin, whose mother had recently died of Breast Cancer, hosted the ceremony as Judy stood proudly on the stage, and talked confidently to the assembled crowd.

The project resulted in the Life Quilt for Breast Cancer Society, which today raises funds to support women living with breast cancer and carries her dream forward. It now lives in the Diane Ferris Art Gallery.

Judy's passion for life and for her children carried her far beyond what was humanly possible. She wanted to take her two children on a trip across Canada. So she had a Volkswagen van equipped especially to enable her to drive, and she accomplished her dream, to leave her kids memories of their mother that would sustain them after she was gone.

Uplifted by fulfilling her soul’s purpose to help other women living with Breast Cancer, with cancer throughout her body and brain, on Morphine for the constant pain, Judy lived an incredible nine more years after the founding of the Life Quilt.

With heroic strength and firmness of purpose, and the support of her friends, to sustain her, Judy left a lasting legacy, a testament to the power of a dream. She died in October of 2002,. Today her friends are working to have Judy Reimer awarded the Order of Canada.

(more on this story)

Shelora Fitzgerald has an M.Ed. in Counseling Psychology and maintains a private practice helping people heal from past and present conditions, and dscover and live their dreams. She consults by phone and in person with people across Canada and the US. She can be reached through http://www.Shelora.com.

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